Diary Blogs Journal

JULY 30, 2026 Gosh, it's one of my worst day today. So I woke up getting nagged by my younger sibling to wash the laundry but I didn't do it because I felt like cinderella in this house and then I get ready to go to school to get my COR because I'm in college now (BSCPE is my program and it sucks because I sucks at it I don't want to talk about this lol). So yeah, I felt so lonely waking up not to mention I had nightmares in my sleep that night so yeah, I'm actually wondering if I had friends because I felt so left out in every groups I join but that doesn't matter because no one cares it's only me I'm just nobody. So yeah, what happened next is wayyy WORSE. So first I rode a jeepney to go to school (sorry about my grammars and maybe spellings btw but whatever I had a long day already it's less than of my concern now) so my anxiety just attacked me again. I was so chill at first but my neck hurts trying to look at the window and not to try to have any eye contact to people or even see their face (yes, that's how socially awkward I am) I get out of the jeepney nothing unnusual, walk a little 'till I reached the pedestrial lane where I crossed the street with other people (btw, that pedestrial lane is scary I almost lost my life in there many times but that's another story XD) I walked a little with my umbrella as always because it's so sunny and I don't like sunny days at all well, maybe a little. Anyway, I walked and walked and I don't know if someone called me but I just walk haha because that's me - I don't have much of a great awareness of the things that are happening around me and I need to work on that I swear. So I reached the school, yay, and then I go straight ahead the registrar's office and oh boy, this is the start of one of the worst day of my life. So I handed my ID to the staff in their and I'm kinda anxious because it's not a familiar staff so yeah my mind is panickinggg and then she got confused because she thought I didn't have an admission slip or whatever you call that, but I already have it I just didn't get to sign the paper that used as a proof because on the day I was giving it, I got annoyed at the previous staff there that used to 'handle' the registrar's office (well I guess he just take a day off though idk) and I leave there without my signature because he gave me a paper that I already signed but it's for the gradeslip in short he gave me a wrong paper to sign to. That's the story of how my name is the only one with pink highlighter in there lol. I had to sit a few seconds there while waiting and then I think she called the teacher who will 'supposedly' gonna sign my admission slip but then I showed him a copy of it and they are shocked lol. ps: that teacher is my previous teacher in first semester in my first year but he said he didn't remember me and I was like, thankful because all I did in that course that he used to teach us is embarrassed myself especially during online classes lol. Anyway, continuing to my embarrassing story, I finally get my COR yayy!! I have to ask that teacher though if I can already go because they didn't say anything at all so I was confused what's the next thing to do lol. I'm like, I need a manual on this life to follow in order to function properly :D. So yeah, here's the annoying part of myself - so I leave the registrar's office now and there are many people or students too specifically incoming first year students in there like lining up too and I don't like walking passed them lol because of my social anxiety and guessed what I walked passed them for four freaking times! First one is when I march in the registrar's office first, the second one is when I'm leaving... then... my freaking adhd ahh self realised that my id is missing and I thought that I left it on the registrar's office and goshhh I really wanna just float in the air far awayyy - the third time I passed them again to go back to the registrar's office. Now, I rang the bell. HUHUHUHU!!! The staff opened the door to call another person! And I was like standing there awkwardly AGAIN. Then after three person, she noticed me and I asked where's my id!!! AND I REALISED IT WHEN SHE"S ALREADY BUSY FINDING IT THAT MY ID IS IN MY FREAKING HAND! You know what I said when I realised the EMBARRASSMENT I felt??? I told her that I'll just gonna find it on the guard outside or maybe I just dropped it somewhere LOL. I lied to hide my freaking stupid ass. I wanna cry and laugh at the same time while typing this. So yeah, I leave that place and walked I walk passed the line of unfamiliar people for the fourth time. And that doesn't end there... yeah, uh-oh! So fast forward to I already in the jeepney going home. I got concious about the experience that I message my friends about that just for me to laugh it off too on my way home. BUT I guess that's another mistake of mine because while texting, I didn't notice that the jeepney already drove passed the place where I have to take off! My dumb ass had the audacity to ask the driver if we already drove passed the manuela where my home is located, and he of course said yes and that why I didn't tell him. That driver knew damn well that I have to take off there because I said that after handling him my payment but he didn't remind me and that's why I hate drivers. Anyway, I know it's my fault but that driver is not 100 percent innocent either! Like he's asking about other places if someone will take off there but he didn't asked abut manuela??? What the heck! So I have no choice but to get the hell out of that jeep and other passenger just witnessed my stupidity and asked me where I was supposed to take off and I said in manuela and he pointed a jeepney for me to ride on and I just said thank you even though I already knew what to do because it's not the first time that it happened to me I swear, the first time is even the worst (I almost got out of las pinas city and that's another long story too). So yeah, I wasted another 11 pesos because of that. I felt like this day is the beginning of my second year college and it has a bad warning already. Finally I reached our home, and my little sister (well, she's not little anymore I'm only three years older than her) and mother have a verbal fight like always (sometimes my mother bring it to another level and turn it into a physical fight) and they fought because of an adaptor of the refrigerator that didn't get to bring back to it's usual place. And yeah, I can't laugh about this day rn because the wound is still new and it still hurts like A LOT. (tbh, I can't laugh at any of my embarrasing days even 'till this day because I pity myself for not having a self esteem and confident) I used to be an optimistic person but now I'm not. Thankfully, there are dogs in this place we're currently in that I can pet so I'm not lonely anymore. Because I actually felt like there are no people who wants to talk to me. XD Anyway, if you're reading this tea, kindly don't share this with anyone especially if you knew me like irl lol. Don't even mention to me that you read about this when you met me in person because I'll run away and hide from you. XD Thanks for reading! Byeeeeee!!!